She Was The Light In My Darkness By Jeremy Thomas Holt

She Was The Light In My Darkness by Jeremy Thomas Holt 

Let me tell you why I say she was the light in my darkness

You knew you loved her with all you heart since the moment you first saw her

You knew she had said no more than once

You knew she was still your friend 

You about her struggles and wished you could help

You never understood why she didn’t tell you things but you accepted it

You continued on as it nothing was happening 

You knew she told lies behind your back

You even felt like you couldn’t trust her 

You had so much confusion and trouble understanding things between you both

But even then you knew you still loved her though you didn’t know why 

You knew what you had to do 

But could you do it?

Could you Just let go and say goodbye

Maybe it wasn’t meant to be

You tried to hard and messed things up

You let yourself down and hated yourself 

You beat yourself up in your own frustration 

You lost control of your thoughts and your mind

Your thoughts were shrouded in darkness and they weren’t your own 

You couldn’t control what come out of you or what you did 

Your heard a laugh that wasn’t yours 

You felt like you were being taunted at and tortured 

You felt like you couldn’t see 2 feet in front of you

You felt like you were watching your life from the sideline

You were weak and fell to your knees 

You began to question God asking “why does this always happen to me?”

Tears ran down your cheeks as you hit a breaking point 

You couldn’t go on with who you had become 

You cried out to God asking Him for strength 

You thought that God wouldn’t answer 

But then you felt God reach out and place His hands upon you

You felt His presence fill and overwhelm your weakness 

You felt strength flow through you once more

You felt rather than hearing God speak to you

You felt Him say “come to Me and I will you rest” 

You felt the darkness leaving you and the light overcoming 

You didn’t hear the laugh that wasn’t your

You didn’t feel tortured or taunted anymore 

You could control your own thoughts and mind again

You didn’t hate yourself anymore 

You had control again over what came out of you and what you did 

You knew your weren’t watching your life from the sidelines anymore

You got to your feet with your strength renewed 

You stopped questioning the Lord’s Will over your life

You had just realized the truth of what God had done

You realized that she was lesson, a power lesson 

You now see what you couldn’t before

You see that God used her to teach you 

He used her to show your own faith in Him was failing 

He used her to expose your doubt

He used her to expose your weakness 

He used her to expose your selfishness 

He used her to expose your true self 

He used her to expose your dark side 

But most importantly He used to her to unlock the light within your heart 

He used to her to bring you back to Him

He used her to save you from yourself 

He used her to show you that He never left your side 

He used her to give you strength 

He used her to renew your hope and your faith 

Now you realize why you loved her all this time 

Because God was using her as light in your life to lead you back to Him. 

Now you understand God's purpose for her being in your life 

Now you’ve found the strength you need to just let Go and say goodbye 

She’s still your friend but you get to see her anymore

While you struggled she moved on

You wish she knew what she truly means to you 

You wish she knew that she was your light in your darkness 

You wish she knew how God used her in your life

That with our her you would’ve never found your way back God 

And that’s why even now you still love her. 

That’s why you’re able to forgive her while others talk behind her back

Even though you know and accept that it may not God's plan for you and her be more than friends. 

You have truly begun to move on and say goodbye but you’ll never forget her and she’ll always be your friend. 

These things that I just wrote about are real events that occurred in my life. I felt A need to describe it in detail to share a power story of how God transformed me to be an even better version of myself. If God did the unbelievable in your life like He did for me by using one of my best and closest friends (who’s name I will not mention at this time) to bring me back into His light I encourage you to share your stories with the world like I am. May God bless you and keep you. Amen